Doug and Jenny

“You have to learn to be happy with the little things or you will break,” Doug said in an email interview.

Photo by Doug Foster

Doug, 19, and Jenny, 19, ended their long-distance relationship after three years of dating, with one year of their relationship being long-distance.

Doug and Jenny met at Ernest Righetti High School in Santa Maria, Calif., and dated for two years, spending every day together. After Doug graduated from high school, he enlisted in the United States Air Force while Jenny was accepted to University of California, Los Angeles, as a freshman.

When Doug enlisted in the Air Force, he and Jenny considered ending their relationship so that Jenny could have more freedom and less worries about Doug as he deployed to different regions of the world.

The couple continued their relationship, however, hoping that technology could keep them connected.

Doug and Jenny tried to communicate with each other every night through Skype, phone calls, text messages, instant messages and Facebook, but technology was often unreliable for Doug during his deployment.

The couple found that sending letters to each other was more thoughtful and reliable.

“I would find something special in my travels that would remind me of her or I knew she liked and would send it to her; my technology was in and out and getting pictures of her was nice,” Doug said.

During Doug and Jenny’s one-year long-distance relationship, Jenny was able to visit Doug once, while Doug was able to take his leave and return home to visit Jenny for a total of about two months.

Being in a long-distance relationship opened Doug’s eyes to the advantages and disadvantages of his relationship with Jenny.

It does show truths that you wouldn’t normally see being with someone all the time,” Doug said. “Some of it is tough to see. Sometimes it’s something amazing you never would have seen.

Doug found being in a long-distance relationship with Jenny to be difficult because he couldn’t share any experiences with her.

“It’s hard to feel what they feel because you’re not there,” Doug said.

Photo by Doug Foster

Doug was able to adjust to being in a long-distance relationship with Jenny by reminding himself that the struggle to stay connected was worth it in order to fight for the woman and country he loved.

I focused my free time on communicating with her and spending as much time as I could” with Jenny, Doug said. “I didn’t do much else.

Photo by Doug Foster

Because Doug’s combat training took up so much of his energy during the day, he had little time to think about how difficult dealing with the distance in his relationship with Jenny was.

“Combat training and working out killed me by the end of the day,” Doug said. “Alone time is what kills, when you’re just sitting there thinking is when you ask yourself every question you could think of.”

After a year of dating long-distance, Doug and Jenny ended their relationship because they realized they were leading two different lives.

At college, she has so many new experiences and so much freedom,” Doug said. “For me in the military, there is no freedom; it’s hard to have friends because they move all over the world and get deployed. The military makes you prioritize your life because you don’t know what’s going to happen next.

Being in a long-distance relationship with Jenny put a strain on their relationship but also made them stronger as a couple. However, the couple struggled with their separation, which was especially difficult for Jenny.

Doug believes that being in a long-distance relationship requires each partner to understand the stress each other is under.

“Understand that you are not the only one stressed,” Doug said.

Your partner may get mad at you for seemingly no reason; it’s stress. You may get angry quite easily too. Just remember that they feel that same way you do. You won’t think about it when it’s happening unless you make sure you remind yourself. I had sticky notes on my laptop.

Though Doug and Jenny’s romantic relationship ended because of the strain of being in a long-distance relationship, Doug doesn’t regret turning their high school romance into long-distance love.

“It’s going to suck, there is nothing fun about it,” Doug said. “You just have to deal with it until it ends. Keep pressing, there is an end.”

Fight for what you love,” Doug said. “It’s going to be a tough fight, but what fight isn’t?

Doug and Jenny continue their relationship as friends.